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Many older adults are spending their golden years taking care of a spouse, elderly parent, or other relative. My book tells one such storythe story of a four-year journey my siblings and I took when our very independent mother had cancer surgery at age ninety. It tells of her resistance to some of her helpers and our struggles trying to have a normal life while caring for her. It tells also of the difficult decisions made on her behalf, especially that final decision to place her in a nursing facility. Two sisters born a decade apart to the same woman felt they were raised by different mothers. The older sister felt treated like a distant relative in the home but with responsibility for the care and behavior of the younger two, while the younger sister was the baby of the family and loved by all. It tells of the double standard prevalent in the South during the first five decades of the twentieth century and how proper Southern ladies were expected to conduct themselves. My story also reveals how someone who felt she was not cared for by her mother can find the courage and stamina to care for that mother when she can no longer care for herself. Research done after the fact is recorded to encourage and help the readers experience less confusion and heartache, and to have an easier time with care taking and decision making if any have to take a similar journey.
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