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A wake-up call for a national crisis in parentingand a deeply helpful book for those who want to see their own behaviors as parents with the greatest possible clarity. Harvard psychologist Richard Weissbourd argues incisively that parentsnot peers, not televisionare the primary shapers of their children's moral lives. And yet, it is parents' lack of self-awareness and confused priorities that are dangerously undermining children's development. Through the author's own original field research, including hundreds of rich, revealing conversations with children, parents, teachers, and coaches, a surprising picture emerges. Parents' intense focus on their children's happiness is turning many children into self-involved, fragile conformists. The suddenly widespread desire of parents to be closer to their childrena heartening trend in many waysoften undercuts kids' morality. Our fixation with being great parentsand our need for our children to reflect that greatnesscan actually make them feel ashamed for failing to measure up. Finally, parents' interactions with coaches and teachersand coaches' and teachers' interactions with childrenare critical arenas for nurturing, or eroding, children's moral lives. Weissbourd's ultimately compassionate messagebased on compelling new researchis that the intense, crisis-filled, and profoundly joyous process of raising a child can be a powerful force for our own moral development.
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