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Rule #10: Learn all the rules...then break them. Lea DeLaria has been breaking rules all her life. Now she offers some of her own.... Cross Howard Stern with Sandra Bernhardt, add a one-two punch, and you have stand-up comic Lea DeLaria, who plays to rave reviews on and off the Broadway stage. Now, in this uproarious collection of essays, DeLaria shares her Modern Day Ten Commandments and X-Rated Rules for the World with anyone bold enough to read them. From fashion advice "Never point at anything beige and call it cool"(Rule #4) to the five myths of ex-girlfriends and the facts about fake breasts, DeLaria offers straight-talking wisdom for a world desperately in need of some raunchy humor. Here Lea shares glimpses of life as a Butch so butch she's mistaken for a man--by her gynecologist. Read all about it as Lea falls hard for the girl of her dreams...reveals how Judy Garland helped her to find her first New York apartment...and gives an appreciation of sex toys that is as outrageous as it is heartfelt. From her promising beginnings as a Nice Italian Catholic girl to her headlined adventures with Nice Italian Catholic girls, among others, here is Lea DeLaria, the stand-up, lay-down, in-your-face comic who tells you everything your mom never wanted you to know.