Life can be challenging--especially our relationships. We all want to feel more connected to our partners. But where do we start? According to marriage and family therapist Michelle Becker, the answer is with ourselves. In this caring and insightful guide, Becker shows readers how to use techniques from her renowned Compassion for Couples program. Instead of defaulting to annoyance, disappointment, or detachment in the face of relationship obstacles, readers learn mindfulness, compassion, and other skills that bring them closer and enrich their lives together. The companion website provides audio downloads for the guided meditation practices.…mehr
Life can be challenging--especially our relationships. We all want to feel more connected to our partners. But where do we start? According to marriage and family therapist Michelle Becker, the answer is with ourselves. In this caring and insightful guide, Becker shows readers how to use techniques from her renowned Compassion for Couples program. Instead of defaulting to annoyance, disappointment, or detachment in the face of relationship obstacles, readers learn mindfulness, compassion, and other skills that bring them closer and enrich their lives together. The companion website provides audio downloads for the guided meditation practices.
Michelle Becker, MA, LMFT, a marriage and family therapist in private practice in San Diego, is dedicated to helping people thrive in healthy, well-connected relationships. She is the developer of the Compassion for Couples program and cofounder of Wise Compassion (www.wisecompassion.com). She is also a cofounder of the teacher training program at the Center for Mindful Self-Compassion and a senior teacher of Compassion Cultivation Training. Through workshops, online education, and a podcast, she shares the knowledge and tools required for people to relate to each other better.
Inhaltsangabe
Foreword, Christopher Germer Introduction I. Start Where You Are: Understanding How Things Go Wrong in Relationships and How Things Get Better 1. We All Need to Be Loved 2. "Why Can't You Be Here for Me?": Understanding What Gets in the Way 3. "I Wish I Could Fix It!": Resisting Pain with Problem Solving 4. "Do You Care?": Finding Safe Connection 5. "Who Will Love Me?": Ensuring That Compassion Is Always Available to You II. Building a Foundation for Compassion in Your Relationship: Mindfulness, Common Humanity, and Kindness 6. Being Present: Mindfulness Skills to See Clearly and Quiet Reactivity 7. Cultivating Connection: Strength in Common Humanity 8. Getting What We Need: Kindness in Three Directions III. Putting It into Practice: Tailoring Compassion Skills to Your Relationship 9. "What Really Matters to Us?": Rooting Your Relationship in Your Values 10. "How Can We Really Get Each Other?": Using Compassionate Communication Skills 11. "Can We Heal Our Wounds?": Cultivating the Conditions for Forgiveness 12. "How Do We Keep Our Love Alive?": Celebrating Positive Experiences Together Resources Notes List of Audio Tracks Index Audio Downloads: 1. Finding Strength and Softness (5:25) 2. Uncovering Your Survival Strategies and How They Impact Your Partner (5:52) 3. Discovering Our Tendencies to Fix and Finding Vulnerability Underneath (4:57) 4. Discovering What's Underneath Your Need to Control, What Your Partner Feels, and How to Speak from Vulnerability (3:29) 5. Finding the Strong Back of Compassion (3:57) 6. Finding the Soft Front of Compassion (4:31) 7. Discovering How We Treat Ourselves and Others (5:35) 8. Putting Self-Compassion into Practice with Mindfulness, Common Humanity, and Kindness (8:54) 9. Supportive Touch (4:31) 10. Soles of the Feet (4:10) 11. Awareness of Breath (7:41) 12. Awareness of Sound (5:38) 13. STOP (5:35) 14. Touching Hands (5:06) 15. Discovering Common Humanity (5:57) 16. Belonging (6:48) 17. Loving-Kindness for Couples (9:13) 18. Motivating Yourself with Compassion (12:22) 19. Soften, Soothe, and Allow (8:42) 20. Meeting Our Own Needs (4:47) 21. Discovering Your Core Values (5:16) 22. STOP and LOVE (13:43) 23. Forgiving Others (7:48) 24. Forgiving Yourself (7:22) 25. Gratitude for Your Partner (3:51)
Foreword, Christopher Germer Introduction I. Start Where You Are: Understanding How Things Go Wrong in Relationships and How Things Get Better 1. We All Need to Be Loved 2. "Why Can't You Be Here for Me?": Understanding What Gets in the Way 3. "I Wish I Could Fix It!": Resisting Pain with Problem Solving 4. "Do You Care?": Finding Safe Connection 5. "Who Will Love Me?": Ensuring That Compassion Is Always Available to You II. Building a Foundation for Compassion in Your Relationship: Mindfulness, Common Humanity, and Kindness 6. Being Present: Mindfulness Skills to See Clearly and Quiet Reactivity 7. Cultivating Connection: Strength in Common Humanity 8. Getting What We Need: Kindness in Three Directions III. Putting It into Practice: Tailoring Compassion Skills to Your Relationship 9. "What Really Matters to Us?": Rooting Your Relationship in Your Values 10. "How Can We Really Get Each Other?": Using Compassionate Communication Skills 11. "Can We Heal Our Wounds?": Cultivating the Conditions for Forgiveness 12. "How Do We Keep Our Love Alive?": Celebrating Positive Experiences Together Resources Notes List of Audio Tracks Index Audio Downloads: 1. Finding Strength and Softness (5:25) 2. Uncovering Your Survival Strategies and How They Impact Your Partner (5:52) 3. Discovering Our Tendencies to Fix and Finding Vulnerability Underneath (4:57) 4. Discovering What's Underneath Your Need to Control, What Your Partner Feels, and How to Speak from Vulnerability (3:29) 5. Finding the Strong Back of Compassion (3:57) 6. Finding the Soft Front of Compassion (4:31) 7. Discovering How We Treat Ourselves and Others (5:35) 8. Putting Self-Compassion into Practice with Mindfulness, Common Humanity, and Kindness (8:54) 9. Supportive Touch (4:31) 10. Soles of the Feet (4:10) 11. Awareness of Breath (7:41) 12. Awareness of Sound (5:38) 13. STOP (5:35) 14. Touching Hands (5:06) 15. Discovering Common Humanity (5:57) 16. Belonging (6:48) 17. Loving-Kindness for Couples (9:13) 18. Motivating Yourself with Compassion (12:22) 19. Soften, Soothe, and Allow (8:42) 20. Meeting Our Own Needs (4:47) 21. Discovering Your Core Values (5:16) 22. STOP and LOVE (13:43) 23. Forgiving Others (7:48) 24. Forgiving Yourself (7:22) 25. Gratitude for Your Partner (3:51)
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