I'm Sorry
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The panic would set in and my mind raced. My heart feeling like it was going to beat out of my chest, the cold sweats and the uncontrollable shaking. I remember thinking, Why? Why, me? I never thought this could happen in real life. This is like something out of a movie. How could both parents abandon me? How could my adult relationships follow the same abusive patterns? Why am I alone? Why was I never enough? How did I let my life get to this point? Abuse, homelessness, more abuse, bulimia, cheating, promiscuity, being a single mom with no money, more abuse and the list goes on. One bad situa...
The panic would set in and my mind raced. My heart feeling like it was going to beat out of my chest, the cold sweats and the uncontrollable shaking. I remember thinking, Why? Why, me? I never thought this could happen in real life. This is like something out of a movie. How could both parents abandon me? How could my adult relationships follow the same abusive patterns? Why am I alone? Why was I never enough? How did I let my life get to this point? Abuse, homelessness, more abuse, bulimia, cheating, promiscuity, being a single mom with no money, more abuse and the list goes on. One bad situation after another and nobody to turn to. How in the world am I going to survive this? I can't do this anymore as I shoved the handful of pills into my mouth and chugged almost a whole bottle of vodka before I drifted into numbness. This is my story of physical and emotional abuse, my desperate attempts to be loved and the chain of events that made me who I am today. I made it.
