God Called You
PAYBACK Punkte
10 °P sammeln!
After the sudden death of my father, at 9 years old, I found myself talking to strangers that wanted to help me stop feeling sad. I had never been around anyone who could explain coping. Through extensive therapy, I was immediately intrigued by how the mind worked. I was fascinated in trying to understand how I could manipulate my own negative thoughts and feelings. Learning how to make myself feel ok, safe. Finding out how resilient I was, opened up a whole new world for me. That didn't have to be filled with anger or abuse. I gained control over myself and my thoughts. Which lead me to dive ...
After the sudden death of my father, at 9 years old, I found myself talking to strangers that wanted to help me stop feeling sad. I had never been around anyone who could explain coping. Through extensive therapy, I was immediately intrigued by how the mind worked. I was fascinated in trying to understand how I could manipulate my own negative thoughts and feelings. Learning how to make myself feel ok, safe. Finding out how resilient I was, opened up a whole new world for me. That didn't have to be filled with anger or abuse. I gained control over myself and my thoughts. Which lead me to dive into any aspect of psychology I could. I wanted to absorb as much information I could to make myself a better sister, daughter, friend and eventually a mother. One month after turning 17 I gave birth to a beautiful healthy baby girl, Macie Dawn, the only thing I had done right thus far. Suddenly I had someone who couldn't leave, who would love me no matter what. For the first time in my life I felt a whole different level of important. I was going to make sure she never felt the pain, sadness, emptiness and abandonment I felt. A life depended on me. Her father, Steven, treated me with kindness. I was 18, just had a baby my last year of high school, living with my fiancé who is 6 years my senior, working in a nursing home. It was us 3 against the world. Steven made sure that her and I were protected, loved and well taken care of. Although he and I had a toxic relationship. This was our world, I was going to make our family worked. However, I soon realized I couldn't fix Steven, I couldn't control his inner demons, from war, from his father's rejection, from drugs, alcohol. After an unsuccessful 90 day stay in a treatment facility, Steven was losing his battle with his demons. Then one year to the day after giving birth to our beautiful baby, Steven took his own life.
Andere Kunden interessierten sich für
