Melissa is what you'd call a marriage warrior. She loves everything love and marriage and has dedicated her life to being a change agent for the cause of building strong marriages. ? For Melissa, it all started with her being a product of a dysfunctional marriage. Born and raised on the island of Jamaica, she watched her parents, who were married for well over 20 years, struggle to prioritize each other, and set a negative example of what marriage should honestly look like. ? Melissa recalls that there was no love or compassion in her household, which was completely opposite of what she saw on television as a child and what she saw in the church. The love outside her home was spine-tingling and made her feel whole and free. Melissa wanted to feel that way with the man God had in store for her. ? Her need to embark on her journey to finding this love began when her mother told her that she should bring home a man like her father when it was her time to get married. That was not what Melissa wanted. She refused to attach herself to anyone who lacked love and compassion as her father did. She went through life doing things that she thought would make her more loved and attached herself to men who would say what she wanted to hear but would do the opposite. ? Through many failed relationships, Melissa learned to love herself and placed value on who she was. She created boundaries and stuck by them. When she met her husband in 2017, she thought he was her reward for finally putting herself first and being obedient to God. Then, the first several months of her marriage rolled by and proved to be anything but rewarding. Turns out Melissa was stuck in the cycle of dysfunction that her parents had endured. ? She was bossy, controlling, disrespectful, and believed that her husband needed to tolerate her behavior because she was "real." She wanted to say anything that was on her mind, in any manner, as her deliverability was a part of her being true to herself. Her favorite saying used to be, "If I can speak my mind to my parents, why would I hold my tongue with you?" ? Through it all, she wanted her marriage to work. She wanted the life she'd always dreamed of. Ultimately, she had to figure out if she wanted to be single or remain married, and from there, she sought therapy, emerged herself in books, scholarly journals, lectures, podcasts, and found her passion for love. ? During her journey, she realized that there was one common theme in all her resources. ? Not one of them prepared her for life within the first few months after marriage. ? Through trial and error, Melissa rebuilt her marriage and, today has dedicated her life's work to help other women make healthy transitions to life after "I Do". ? Melissa can be found on Instagram @melissatwalker_ and on her website melissatwalker.com.
